Fuck Me Into Space

The official line from NASA and Roscosmos is that no-one has had sex aboard a spacecraft in flight.

It's not that I dispute the veracity of this claim. Soyuz is smaller than a compact car, and the Shuttle's crew had so little privacy that anything between "none" and "seven-way orgy" would have been virtually impossible.

I can't help but wonder, though, what it would be like to make love aboard the ISS at 25,000 km/h. It takes skill, stamina and passion to make it through years of intense training and the bone-shaking eight-minute ride to orbit. Surely those same qualities must be reflected outside of work.

We'd meet in the Cupola, just before dawn. Brilliant and capable, as all astronauts are, she's also smoking hot and wears nothing under her zippered blue jumpsuit.

Portugal and Spain fly past as we lock lips and tear each other's clothing open. I press her against the windows and spoon her from behind, kissing her neck, as the sun bursts onto the scene and the Alps recede towards the horizon.

By the time the horn of India rolls into view, we're locked in a zero-G 69. She pulls me tight and keeps sucking as I come. A few moments later, her first orgasm, sharp and intense, echoes through the module as she arches her back and briefly pulls away from me.

We pause for a few minutes to watch a storm over the Indian Ocean, but she soon pumps me back to attention and we fuck, deep and hard and energetic, in a range of positions impossible within the confines of gravity. She comes again, slower and deeper this time, her orgasm lasting as long as the sunset. I explode inside her as she screams with ecstacy.

Locked in embrace, we drift in and out of consciousness around the dark side. Millions of stars, brighter and clearer than they can ever be seen from the ground, illuminate our bodies as we cross the Pacific. We awaken to the city lights of the Eastern Seaboard and, after one more long gentle kiss, pull our jumpsuits back on.

Ninety minutes after daybreak, it is dawn once again, and we silently float away to our separate task list