Campfire blaze - Pt. I

Three friends, two vans, one weekend. The three of us have a deep connection, established within around one year of weekly evenig gatherings. The two boys started to trust me very fast, conversations got intimate and under the skin. One of them, F., got my attention from the first second. He smelled like freedom and independence to me, by wearing Patagonia shirts and talking about biking. One component I was unsure about, was their connection to enhance life with substances. That uncertainty was new to me, pushing my excitement into the sky.

Now we started into this weekend, first time spending more time than just an evening together. The spot F. selected was perfect: a mystical valley with a litte river surrounded by the forest. The campfire on the first evening had a special glow, we set loose from the work week and flowed into the freedom lying ahead of us. F. and me had a deep conversation about life and his struggles within. I constantly looked into his eyes - it was already intense., but still K. was around, listening, watching... Close to 01:00 he went to his van to sleep, wishing us a good night. It did take us a few minutes to get familiar with the new situation, realizing the opportunities. We never had been together alone. The glances intensified, the smiles, the tension. "..... hey, you know, I feel there's more between you and me, but we are close friends - we are a pack of three. You know, when I described my struggles finding a girlfriend, I always pictured a cheeky, lively and uncomplicated one like you. That spark of wilderness, questioning norms of society by confessing your non-monogam lifestyle, it gets me every time you talk about it. But I don't want destroy these friendships we have.", he said. His eye contact was blazing me inside.