Sex and White Canvas
A Sexual Fantasy
The man is older. He taught me karate when I was a teenager. He was too old for me then and I, of course, too young for him. He occupies my fantasies as I remember him, the crisp-white suit, the triangle of bare-skin with soft hairs and the black belt holding his naked body from my view.
We practiced kana and take-downs. He would show me how to throw him to the ground and how to hold him there. Doing that to a man twice my size was powerful. Then heâd take me in his hands and throw me to the ground. At just 16, it was hard to not be both intimidated and aroused.
So the fantasy is always the same. It's eight years later and Iâm grown now. He is still the older man, always in his dojo. I walk in as the class has finished. Thereâs still the smell of sweat and washed-cotton moist in the room. I take my shoes off, as weâre supposed to before we step onto the white canvas flooring. Heâs at the top of the room, wiping himself off with a towel, still red-faced and breathless from the class.
He recognises me and smiles. Heâs polite; he asks me how Iâve been. I try to be confident. Iâve wanted this man since I was a girl. We laugh and talk and I tell him Iâve kept up my practice since our lessons all those years ago. I ask him if he wants me to prove it, to spa with him. Anything to be able to touch him. Any excuse for his hands to touch me.
He laughs and agrees. I take off my heavy jumper, itâs okay because I have a bralet underneath. He tightens his belt. I amuse him with some smack-talk. Tell him Iâm going to beat his ass. Tell him he stands no chance. We play for a while until weâre both warm and red-cheeked. Then things change. I want him. I want him to know that. I slip my hand into his robe as we play. He looks at me and he gets it. I try to fight him but he lifts me and takes me down to the ground. He pins by arm behind my head as he once taught me to do. I reach up to kiss him, to bite his lip. He kisses me back and my body shakes with the reality of it. Itâs actually happening.
With my free hand I reach down to pull his belt lose...
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